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The Washington Post's "Style Invitational" asked readers to take any word
from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting or changing one
letter, and supply a new definition. Here are recent winners:
Reintarnation
Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
Foreploy
Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of obtaining
sex.
Giraffiti
Vandalism spray-painted very, very high . . . .
Tatyr
A lecherous Mr. Potato Head.
Sarchasm
The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient who
doesn't get it.
Inoculatte
To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
Hipatitis
Terminal coolness.
Osteopornosis
A degenerate disease.
Burglesque
A poorly planned break-in. (See: Watergate)
Karmageddon
It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes,
right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like a serious
bummer.
Glibido
All talk and no action.
Dopeler effect
The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you
rapidly.
Intaxication
Euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which lasts until you
realize it was your money to start with.
Bozone
The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from
penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of
breaking down in the near future.
Cashtration
The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially
impotent for an indefinite period.
Dopeler effect
The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you
rapidly.
Arachnoleptic fit
The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked
through a spider web.
Beelzebug
Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at 3 in
the morning and cannot be cast out.
Caterpallor
The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're
eating.
Ignoranus
A person who's both stupid and an asshole.